"Read this if…" online messages, posts, group chats or shared images are being used to hurt someone, and you want to understand what counts as cyberbullying and what you can do about it.

A message can take seconds to send and much longer to recover from. A humiliating photograph might be forwarded around a class before the person in it even knows it exists. An argument in a group chat can continue long after the school day ends. And a person targeted at work may find the same hostility waiting in their messages at home.

Cyberbullying is bullying carried out through digital technology. It can involve messaging apps, social networks, gaming communities, online forums, email and other services where people communicate or share content.

Technology changes the reach of bullying. An audience can grow quickly, harmful content can be copied, and messages can arrive at any hour. But the same important questions still apply: What happened? Is someone being targeted? Is there a pattern or power imbalance? What help would make them safer?

What cyberbullying can look like

Online bullying can involve:

• Harassing messages: repeated insults, threats or unwanted contact, including through new accounts after someone has blocked the sender.
• Public humiliation: cruel posts, manipulated images, mocking videos or group chats created to embarrass someone.
• Rumours and impersonation: spreading false claims or using a fake profile to make it appear that someone said or did things they did not.
• Deliberate social exclusion: encouraging a group to shut someone out as a way to punish or humiliate them.
• Sharing private information: revealing someone's contact details, address, location or personal communications to expose them to unwanted attention.
• Sexual harassment or image-based abuse: unwanted sexual messages, threats to share intimate material, or sharing it without consent.
• Encouraging a pile-on: inviting others to mock, threaten or overwhelm a person with messages.

These behaviours may overlap, and some can amount to harassment, threats or other offences even when they do not fit a particular definition of bullying.

Bullying, disagreement and serious one-off harm

People disagree online. A heated conversation, criticism of an opinion or a friendship ending does not automatically amount to cyberbullying.

Bullying generally involves aggressive or unwanted behaviour with a real or perceived power imbalance and repetition, or the likelihood of repetition. Online, a single post may be shared repeatedly or expose a person to ongoing humiliation. The behaviour and its consequences matter more than counting messages.

An isolated threat, sexual exploitation or disclosure of private intimate material may require urgent action even without an established bullying pattern. You do not need to settle on the right label before asking for help.

Consider two situations. Two classmates argue publicly about a group assignment and then stop. Their exchange may be hurtful, but it does not necessarily show bullying. In another case, classmates create an account to ridicule one learner and share its posts around several groups. The target has difficulty escaping the attention, and the group has the advantage of numbers. That raises a different concern.

It is possible to take harm seriously without treating every unpleasant online interaction as the same thing.

Why online bullying can be difficult to escape

When a person is targeted online, the audience may include classmates, colleagues, friends and strangers. The person may not know who has seen a post or whether copies still exist.

Digital platforms can also blur the boundary between places where someone encounters the aggressor and places where they ordinarily feel safe. Bullying started at school might continue through evening messages. Workplace humiliation may carry into private accounts.

The effects vary. Someone may withdraw from a group, dread notifications, struggle to concentrate or become reluctant to attend school or work. Those changes can have other causes, too; they are reasons to check in rather than proof of cyberbullying.

The person being targeted should not have to abandon their online life for the abuse to stop. Taking a break may help them recover some space, but responsibility for the conduct remains with the person causing harm and with institutions that have a duty to respond.

If it is happening to you

You do not need to handle repeated harassment alone or prepare a perfect explanation before telling someone. A reasonable starting point is to describe the messages, accounts or posts, how often the conduct has happened, and whether you feel safe.

Tell someone who can help

You might speak with a parent, another trusted adult, teacher, school safeguarding contact, counsellor, manager or HR representative. The appropriate person depends on your age, setting and the nature of the conduct.

You can begin simply: “Someone keeps posting about me and I need help working out what to do.” If the first person dismisses you, consider another trusted person or a more senior safeguarding or workplace contact.

Keep useful information, when safe

For ordinary abusive messages or posts, it can help to note the date, time, platform, account name, link and what happened. Screenshots or retained messages may support a report to the platform, school or employer. Keep them in a place others cannot easily access and avoid repeatedly revisiting material that upsets you.

Important exception: if intimate or sexually explicit material involving a child is circulating, do not download, forward or make new copies of the images to collect evidence. Tell a trusted adult or appropriate specialist service promptly. You can explain where the material appeared and provide non-image details, such as the account or link, where safe. People who are adults now but were under 18 when an image was taken can also seek specialist help.

If an abusive partner or another person may monitor your devices, collecting evidence, changing settings or searching for help on that device may introduce further risks. Consider a safer means of contacting a specialist service before making changes.

Use platform tools thoughtfully

Most major services offer ways to report accounts or posts, mute messages, restrict contact or block people. Consider what you need to retain for a report before removing access, if it is safe to do so.

Reporting does not guarantee immediate removal, and blocking may not prevent someone from using other accounts. If the threat extends beyond a platform, involve a person or organisation able to address it outside the app as well.

Do not let someone else's behaviour decide your response

You do not owe an aggressor an argument, an explanation or a retaliatory post. You can stop replying, seek support and ask that the behaviour be addressed. If you feel angry or frightened, those reactions do not make you responsible for the bullying.

When online harm needs a more urgent response

Threats of physical violence, stalking, extortion, sexual exploitation, intimate-image abuse or credible threats to someone's immediate safety need more than a routine platform report.

If someone is in immediate physical danger, contact local emergency services. For other serious threats, seek timely help from a trusted adult, appropriate safeguarding professional, specialist support organisation or police, depending on the circumstances.

If a child is being threatened with the release of intimate images, do not bargain with the person making the threat or circulate the images. Seek help promptly. **Take It Down** is a free service for eligible intimate images taken when a person was under 18; it can help limit sharing on participating platforms. It does not guarantee removal everywhere. For eligible adult intimate images, **StopNCII.org** offers a related service. Neither replaces reporting serious threats or accessing immediate support.

How parents and caregivers can help

Children often worry that telling an adult will result in confiscated devices, public confrontation or blame. The first response matters.

Listen privately and without judgement. Ask what happened, whether the messages are continuing and what the child is most afraid will happen next. Avoid promises you may be unable to keep, including absolute secrecy when safeguarding duties apply.

Learn enough about the platform to understand the problem and its reporting tools. Explain what steps you intend to take and, where appropriate, involve the child in deciding how to proceed. A school may need to address bullying between learners even when the messages were sent outside school hours; its ability and responsibilities depend on the circumstances and applicable policies.

If sexual material involving children is part of the incident, do not ask the child to send it to you as proof. Seek specialist guidance on reporting and preserving relevant information safely.

Reasonable online boundaries can help with general safety, but blanket surveillance or automatic punishment for disclosing harm may discourage a child from asking for help again.

What schools and workplaces should do

A responsible response starts with assessing safety and gathering information fairly. It should not require the person targeted to confront a group alone or accept an informal apology as the only possible outcome.

Schools can consider whether learners need safeguarding support, whether a group dynamic is reinforcing the behaviour, and what proportionate steps will prevent further harm. Employers can examine whether online conduct affects the working environment and whether established harassment, disciplinary or support processes apply.

Do not publish allegations, organise a public confrontation or assume every account belongs to the person someone suspects. Identity and facts should be assessed fairly, with attention to privacy and possible retaliation.

If you witness cyberbullying

A bystander can make the situation worse by forwarding the post, laughing along, adding an emoji or inviting others to pile on. You can choose another response.

Check in privately with the person being targeted. Let them know what you saw without insisting that they report immediately. If it is safe and appropriate, refuse to participate, report the content through the platform or help the person approach a trusted adult or relevant workplace contact.

Avoid sharing the humiliating post as a way of raising awareness; that may spread the very material causing harm. In a situation involving serious threats, child sexual exploitation or immediate danger, involve appropriate safeguarding or emergency services rather than relying on a private conversation alone.

If you recognise your own behaviour

Perhaps you have joined a pile-on, forwarded a humiliating screenshot, used a second account to contact someone who blocked you, or dismissed the effect of something you posted as a joke.

Stop the conduct. Do not repost or circulate the material again. Take responsibility without blaming the person you targeted for being upset. Where appropriate and safe, cooperate with efforts to remove harmful content and with a fair response by the school, workplace or platform.

An apology may be useful, but it is not a demand for forgiveness or renewed contact. Changing your conduct consistently is more important than persuading someone that you meant no harm.

Final thought

The internet is part of everyday life. Cruelty there can affect someone's friendships, education, work and sense of safety just as seriously as cruelty in a classroom or office.

Notice the behaviour. Take it seriously without rushing to unsupported conclusions. Help the person affected reach someone who can act, and refuse to become part of the audience that keeps the harm going.

See something, say something — and make sure the response helps rather than spreads the harm.

Sources

These sources inform the definitions and response guidance above. Platform tools and service coverage can change; none of these links replaces emergency or local safeguarding help.

• StopBullying.gov — What Is Cyberbullying — definition, examples and how digital reach can intensify harm.
• StopBullying.gov — Report Cyberbullying — documenting ordinary abusive content and using platform reporting tools.
• UNICEF South Africa — Cyberbullying: What Is It and How to Stop It — trusted adults, platform reporting and careful use of blocking and privacy controls.
• NCMEC — Take It Down — free service for eligible intimate images taken when a person was under 18; not guaranteed removal everywhere.
• NCMEC — Take It Down FAQ — eligibility and guidance not to download or forward child sexual imagery merely to use the service.
• StopNCII.org — related service for eligible adult intimate images.