Why We Exist
This is why DBTG exists.
Bullying, harassment, and gender-based violence can leave people uncertain about what they are experiencing, how to describe it, and what to do next. Harmful behaviour is not always recognised for what it is, particularly when it develops gradually or has become normalised.
DBTG exists to make these subjects easier to understand. Clear explanations can help someone recognise a harmful pattern, support another person more effectively, or reconsider behaviour they had previously dismissed.
Responsibility is not shared equally in every situation. Those causing harm are accountable for their conduct. Those experiencing it deserve to be heard and supported. Understanding these differences is part of meaningful prevention.
Our Principles
DBTG believes that…
Harm should be recognised, not minimised.
Accountability and compassion can exist together.
Prevention begins with understanding.
Nobody is beyond learning.
Our Mission
Helping people recognise harmful behaviour and understand what comes next.
Our mission is to provide accessible, carefully considered educational material about bullying, harassment, gender-based violence, and related harmful behaviour.
We explore how these behaviours develop, how they affect people, and what individuals and communities can do to recognise and address them. Our material is intended for people experiencing harm, those offering support, and anyone willing to examine their own conduct.
Education has limits. Serious or ongoing harm may require professional assistance, institutional action, or other forms of intervention. DBTG helps readers understand the issues and recognise when further support may be necessary.
- Clear explanations of harmful behaviour, its effects, and the factors that allow it to continue.
- Educational guidance that recognises the importance of trusted people, appropriate services, and practical intervention.
- A resource for understanding and prevention, with signposting to external support where appropriate.
Highlights
- Clear explanations of harmful behaviour, its effects, and the factors that allow it to continue.
- Educational guidance that recognises the importance of trusted people, appropriate services, and practical intervention.
- A resource for understanding and prevention, with signposting to external support where appropriate.
Our Story
This project began when bullying hit home.
Don't Be THAT Guy began in 2018 after founder Kobus Myburgh's son experienced bullying at school. What started as one family's attempt to understand and respond to that experience led to years of research, an educational presentation, and eventually the learning hub you see today.
The project has grown beyond the experience that inspired it, but its purpose remains closely connected to those beginnings: helping people recognise harm, understand its consequences, and consider how it can be prevented.
- DBTG grew from one family's experience with school bullying and a determination to understand it.
- What began as a personal experience has developed into a learning resource for a wider community.
- Our origins continue to shape how we approach understanding, accountability, and prevention.
Highlights
- DBTG grew from one family's experience with school bullying and a determination to understand it.
- What began as a personal experience has developed into a learning resource for a wider community.
- Our origins continue to shape how we approach understanding, accountability, and prevention.
Latest From The Hub
Recent reading across bullying and gender-based violence.
Healthy Disagreement vs Emotional Abuse
Disagreements happen in healthy relationships too. Understanding the difference between ordinary conflict and emotional abuse can help you recognise when arguments become harmful.
Coercive Control and Unequal Power
When rules, monitoring, and punishment shrink someone's life — coercive control explained, and why leaving is not as simple as outsiders think.
Early Warning Signs of Gender-Based Violence
GBV is not only bruises. Learn early emotional, sexual, economic, and control warning signs — in relationships, families, and teen dating.
GBV and Bullying: Related but Not the Same
Bullying and gender-based violence share tactics but differ in power and stakes. Learn when each label helps — and when mixing them causes harm.
Reading Lens
Understanding harm means looking at the whole picture.
Harmful behaviour takes different forms and occurs in different settings. A child being bullied at school, an employee facing persistent intimidation, and someone experiencing coercive control in a relationship may face very different circumstances.
These experiences deserve careful attention to their individual characteristics. The language we use matters, as do questions of responsibility, power, safety, and the support available to those affected.
- People experiencing harm deserve to be taken seriously, without having their experiences dismissed or minimised.
- People offering support need to understand the situation and recognise what kind of response may be helpful.
- Prevention requires attention to behaviour, accountability, power imbalances, and the conditions that allow harm to continue.